And the managing editor is out in leave today

Awesome. Guess that means I’ve got to hand it in tomorrow. Ugh! Was all ready! Got all psyched up and controlled and now have to do that all over again tomorrow :(

… Or I’ll take an accidental nap

Came home and was feeling really anxious about tomorrow - heart racing and a bit lightheaded so I decided to lie down. Then promptly passed out for two+ hours! Woke up around 5, had a shower and dinner and wrote up my notice. Still really scared about tomorrow, but hopefully they are okay about it and don’t make me stay too much longer. The ideal would be that tomorrow is my last day, but I doubt that’ll happen. I’m guessing best case they’ll only make me stay two weeks until my colleague is back from vacation. Worst case they make me do the full four weeks. Fingers crossed, guys!

Hopefully I’ll be back to living up to my blog name of “funemployment” before too long. I’d really like a week or two to rest and get back to myself. Sleep in, eat healthy meals at home and get at least one workout a day. Hoping I’ll score another job by end of June the latest.

Thanks for all the support, guys!

Still scared to go in tomorrow and hand in my notice but it needs to be done. Had a great weekend down south but definitely impacted a bit by the anxiety about work.

One of the other girls is quitting soon, too, for the same reasons as me and thinks we should file joint action against the company through fair work Australia. Not sure if its worth it though. I feel like the best thing is just to quit and move on - make a clean break.

Fingers crossed they won’t make me work the full four weeks, I’m hoping the longest I’ll have to stay is a week or two because everyday there being subjected to the bullying is making me more unhealthy. Will hopefully post more later after we get home - want to do a workout - and will let you know how tomorrow goes!

Quitting on Monday

Yeah. Editor lost it on me again yesterday over a minor mistake, drove me to tears and a panic attack. So I called her out on it and let her know how she made me feel. Her response was telling me to toughen up and get used to criticism and that I needed to be able to handle high stress environments better… Sorry. There’s a difference between high stress and abusive. When I completed two majors at one of the best universities in America, that was stressful. Completing a master’s in journalism at one of the best, if not the absolute, journalism schools in the world, there was pressure. Working at a major daily newspaper in Australia was hard work. None of my editors found the need to drive me to tears. I’ve never had anxiety before and I do now due to this job.

So I’m done. Giving my four weeks notice on Monday, even without another job. My life is too short to be treated this poorly or hate what I do. I always promised myself I’d never stay at a job I hate. I’m holding myself to that promise.

My health and well being are worth more than this paycheck.

So apparently someone I was following just turned into a porn thing?

Either that or it somehow had my follow it without me following it? Just a bit concerned because when I clicked the name so I could go to the blog and unfollow it, I then tried to go back to the Tumblr homepage and it told me I was logged out and asked me to log back in. Definitely didn’t log out. So now I’m on a different web browser.

Telling y’all so if you see some weird porn shit on your dash you can do the smart thing, go to blogs you follow and unfollow through there.

Any advice followers? Do we think it’s a weird coincidence or did my Google Chrome just get compromised?

FIRST REAL WORKOUT IN ALMOST THREE WEEKS!

Finally like 99.9% better (still the ocasional cough) so decided to go for it. It’s supposed to start raining any time here in Perth so didn’t want to risk the run - or be super depressed by how much I’ve backtracked - so I decided to do 30 Day Shred. I’m just going to restart level 2, no way I’ll be ready for level 3 in a few days. But yeah, needed more than a few breaks but made it through! Currently sitting as a sweaty little mess on the floor trying to gain the strength to take a shower. But really happy I managed it!

Going to do another workout tomorrow - hopefully a run depending on the weather - then I’ll have Friday and possibly Saturday off because we’re heading down to Margaret River. It was the boy’s birthday yesterday so we’re going to celebrate! Hopefully will have time for a workout of some kind Saturday, but if not will just wait til we get back up here Sunday and go for a run.

A bit bummed because I really don’t think I’m going to be able to run the 4K at the end of the month since I’ve lost so many training weeks, but going to get back into it and do my best!

Good news: I didn’t really gain any weight. Finally got on the scale and I’m at 146lbs. Given I usually weigh myself in the mornings on an empty stomach and all that, I’m guessing a day’s worth of food probably adds up to around 2lbs. Which is good because that means that even though I wasn’t tracking, I was still eating healthy enough to maintain and that makes me super happy because it means I’m being good without trying!

Got a (little) workout in today!

Just 15 minutes of interval work on the elliptical, but better than nothing! Worked up a damn good sweat, but hit a point where I couldn’t really breathe very well. Too much coughing and nose too stuffed up. So pushed another few minutes to hit 15 then called it a day and collapsed into a coughing fit on the floor.

Still: Progress! Another couple days and hopefully I’ll be all better and ready to kick some ass again. I don’t think I’ve gained much weight, but I’ve definitely lost a ton of muscle and gained some fat so I’m a bit bigger than I was. Ugh. Hate this two steps backwards thing!

Totally exhausted after work

One of the girls on our team is out on vacation for four weeks, so even though I wasn’t feeling great this morning I knew I needed to get in there since it’s a busy time of year… and I was right. Was writing/researching/working all day - normally I have at least 30 min or so to relax a bit, eat my lunch, check Facebook. Nope! Editor had me working all the way through. So now I’m exhausted. Any voice I had managed to get back is gone and by the end of the day I was having coughing fits every five minutes which trust me, sound unbelievably sexy. So sexy, in fact, that when I had one on the bus (and I was covering my mouth, coughing into my elbow like a good kid so I don’t spread germs with my hands) the guy in front of me turned around to give me a terrified look before leaning forward in his seat for the next five minutes until I got off. Seriously. Edge of his seat, leaning forward. Thanks, buddy.

Oh, and as y’all probably expect by now after my rant the other week, my boss didn’t ask me once how I was feeling. Not when I handed her the doctor’s note to excuse my absence (I feel like I’m in high school), not when I was coughing, not when she emailed to say I was behind in my feature writing and needed to finish three by the end of the week, not even when our assistant editor asked me. Or the main boss. Or the copy editor. Or the five other people who came up to my desk to check on me and offer to get me water/anything I need. I LOVE being appreciated.

Sorry for the rant, kids. Just feeling so crap after pushing really hard at work. Managed to get a bit of a walk in on my way home - took the long way from the bus stop - but now my throat kills, my body aches and my head hurts. Resting a bit then hopping in the shower before the boy gets home. Pretty sure I’m gonna sleep in the guest room tonight so I don’t get him sick :(